mylifeinrambles.blog

Y’all. I saw this on my Facebook feed this morning and died. And probably not for the reason you’d think.

I have zero desire to be petty here. No shade, no drama, nothing negative to say about a single soul. Because here’s where my brain actually went: the effort. I got stuck on the effort factor.

We all want effort, right? We wanted it from the people we used to be with. We want it from the people we’re with now. That’s sort of the entire point of the thing. And — let’s be honest — we also wanted those people to be at least a little obsessed with us. Don’t act brand new. You did too.

So somebody wants to pour that kind of energy into me? Reading my posts? Studying my stories? Keeping a timeline? Girl. Who am I to stand in the way of your passion project.

Stalk away. Truly. My only note — and I say this as constructive feedback — is that the surveillance would be so much more rewarding for you if you’d just tell me you’re doing it. I am deeply, almost impressively oblivious to subtle signs. You could be three years deep in my photos and I would not notice. That effort is going completely unwitnessed, and honestly? That breaks my heart for you.

So write me. Slide in. Let me know. I will start posting for you. Curated content. Things I think you’d enjoy. I’ll caption a sunset “this one’s for the people who really see me” and you’ll know. You’ll know. I like the time and dedication you’re putting into this relationship — because that’s what this is now, we’re in a relationship — and I am more than happy to return the favor. Communication is everything in a partnership.

And genuinely? If you’re dating my ex, I think we’d get along. I bet you’re lovely. I bet you’re a whole delight. He’s not appreciating the effort? Not noticing the little things you do? Babe. I got you. I would be flattered into the stratosphere to have someone this invested in me.

I do have to add one caveat, in the interest of a healthy working relationship.

If you’re only here to be petty, stir drama, or do the whole mean-girl thing — I’m out. Respectfully. Ain’t nobody got time for all that jazz, and frankly it would lower the tone of what we’re building. I’m offering you a sincere, mutually appreciative stalking arrangement. Let’s keep it classy. There’s really no need for anything else.